Like all my fellow fellows, I've been filling out my RAE assessment material. Right across Cambridge you can hear the anxious tapping of keys and the soft sound of brainy brows furrowing as some of Britain's finest intellects try and work out how elastic they can be with the truth. "Does that night when four of us got drunk in a bar and discussed Kant for six hours constitute a workshop? If so, was it an invited workshop, so it can go under the Esteem Indicators section?
What worries me is how my forms are different from everyone else's. No, really.
Everyone else's resumés make them sound like they are:
a) a professional academic, with an excellent publications record and many transferable skills
b) someone with a bright future as a Professor in some esteemed university.
My resumé makes me sound like I am:
a) a flake
b) a spy